Improve your perceptions in life, and it will improve your action/reaction to others. For almost three years, a good friend struggled with his marital breakup, and he was beating himself in the head, over and over again, thinking he was the cause, that he should have been more in tune with himself and her, and that it was all his fault that she chose to not be with him. Fortunately, he rarely goes back to that negativity, and is in a much calmer state now, because he has owned what was his, who he is, and now has tools that help get him out of his funk.
Positive thoughts = positive actions/reactions. Negative thoughts = negative actions/reactions. Choose positive every time.
I was an office manager several years ago where one of the tenants just didn’t like me. Or, so I thought. I was hesitant to approach this person because I felt negative vibes - every time. Perhaps I was intimidated by her, or she by me. What I’ve learned over the years, is that my reaction to comments or behavior mirrored what I needed to change within myself. I perceived her lack of interest in my life as unacceptable and rude, and it caused me to avoid conversation with her. The real truth hit me hard in the face. It was really all about me. I didn’t ask anything of her and her life. I didn’t take an interest in her. Most people like to talk about themselves or their families, don’t they? So, I reversed my perception, and put into action, kindness, respect, and a heartfelt interest in her and her life, causing the negativity to dissipate almost immediately with every encounter. Whenever we chance to bump into one another, it’s a genuine, friendly outcome.
In relationships, communicate from your heart, for if you don’t, you leave yourself open to deception and misunderstanding. This happens often in the workplace, where friends/co-workers use passive-aggressive chatter. We know it occurs in many love relationships. When conversations cease or are at a minimum, miscommunication sets in. We lose connection. Life’s biggest lessons, opportunities, and gifts are found when we are in our connection with others. You must be open to what works for you in your environments, and as you come to an amenable solution, more power to you! Take charge of your life...only you can determine how you handle life-changing experiences. Only YOU can turn the negative and turn it into positive. You will reap the benefits.